1. When This Vividly Reminded Everyone Of That Recurring Childhood Nightmare
Mostly impressive, slightly terrifying. Definitely interested in buying one.
2. When This Diva Llama Wasn’t Afraid To Be Fierce
Because it woke up like this. As a llama.
3. When This Primitive Form Of Tinder Happened
Coincidentally, I have a sign that says, “Gents -- I am looking for a sweetheart who loves to make signs and crochet American flags to the sounds of domestically-made fireworks.”
4. When The Monkey Man Reminded Us All, “You Do You”
He’s kind of like Portland’s own Batman, when you think about it.
5. When Someone Walked This Not-Dog Around Town
Well, if it doesn’t bark like a dog, or bite like a dog, or smell like a dog...yeah, that’s definitely a goat.
6. When Darth-Vader-Bagpiper-Unicycle-Guy Brought Our Trippiest Dreams To Life
Can this please be a thing that happens in the next trilogy?
7. When This Person Couldn’t Find A Bike Rack And Improvised
Trees are kind of like nature’s bike racks. Think about it.
8. When This Contraption Both Confused And Impressed Bystanders
I’m sure there’s some obvious benefit to this design that we’re all missing.
9. When We Saw What They Did There
Plants? No, I haven’t botany yet.
10. When This Pirate Made Port In Portland
In case you’re wondering, after this picture he also drank some port.
11. When This Teddy Bear Was Embarrassed That He Couldn’t Fit In The Car
“Ugh, fine, let’s just take the supersized Barbie convertible to brunch.”
12. When Someone Came Up With This Totally Viable Alternative To Mainstream Mint Toothpaste...
...aka, preferred toothpaste of The Man. Don’t let him win.
13. When--OMG, Is That You Danny The Dreadlock??
What, you don’t name your dreadlocks? Danny’s the sassy one.
14. When This...Thing...Happened…
Not quite sure what’s going on here, but I do like it and I will run away from it if confronted by it IRL.
15. When This Cat Was Liberated
But this is clearly a hoax because any self-respecting Portland cat uses only antique Olivetti typewriters and recycled artisan paper.
16. When An Alien Arrived And Completely Misunderstood The Function Of Shoes
“Why would I put my tentacles in these? They make much better flier holders.”
17. When These Llamas Were Totally Chill Around The Paparazzi
Spotted -- Brangellama going for an evening stroll without the kids!
18. When Some Clever Portlander Thought Of This Idea
How good this poetry is is inversely related to how much it rains. These folks let the gods decide.
19. When This Little Hitchhiker Struck A Pose
“Get my good side, and then we can go to Le Pigeon.”
20. When This Cookie Jar Yard Sale Put The Fun In Funtastic
“I’ve been looking for a Donald Duck cookie jar but neither of these are just right. Do you have more in the back?”
21. When This Stack Of Portland’s Favorite Mode Of Transportation Appeared
This counts as eco-friendly art, right?
22. When This Made Food Trucks Totally Obsolete
When food scenes in cities across America were just catching up on the food trucks trend, Portland goes and does this. Typical.
23. When This Unicorn Patiently Waited Outside
Portland is very dog-friendly, but people are still warming up to the whole miniature unicorns as pets thing.
24. When This Little Fella Turned Up To Offer Its Services
It’s really cute until you realize that this robot is planning on kidnapping a woman named Joy and framing you for it.
25. When These Santas Made Everyone Feel Really Weird
And at the end of the race spectators line up for pictures with Santa and it’s not weird at all. Also cheaper than Santa pictures at the mall.
What do you think makes Portland the coolest? Tell us in the comments below!
