The author's posts are entirely his or her own and may not always reflect the views of Movoto.
1. Spanglish Is The Official Language Of San Antonio--Deal With It
It is a rarity to find a San Antonian who uses just one language on a regular basis. But this is a benefit to you, as you get to learn a new language for free!
Here's what a typical San Antonian conversation sounds like: "Hey, vamos a la tienda to buy barbacoa so Benny can cook for the Cowboys game." "Dame una margarita grande for my boyfriend and a giant one for me."
2. You Eat Off Of The Food Pyramid--San Antonians Eat Off The Taco Triangle
Unlike in your neck of the woods, the best tacos in the world are available 24 hours a day, seven days a week here in the Alamo City. Beef, chicken, beans and cheese, barbacoa, papas con huevo--the options are endless. San Antonians know every possible combination. We eat tacos for breakfast, lunch, dinner; when we're drunk, when we're sober; when we graduate, if we fail-- in other words,
every time is taco time.
3. San Antonians Drink One Thing: Margaritas.
The world's best tacos deserve something equally tasty to wash them down, and San Antonio is known for its killer margaritas. San Antonians drink so much tequila and triple sec, we get the Dos Equis man shakin' in his boots. None of that fake, pre-mixed phony stuff gets by us; our standards are so high for getting buzzed off of that sweet nectar, some of the nation's top margarita-makin' restaurants like Mi Tierra, are right here in this great city.
By the way, whether frozen or on the rocks--you get it with salt. Period.
4. In San Antonio, It's Not A Party Until Someone Shoots Of A Gun
We've already established that San Antonio runs on Margarita's so it's hardly a shock that its a city that knows how to party. The good news is that it means there is always something fun to do. The bad news... you may need to dodge a few--ahem, celebratory--bullets (dodge and weave, baby).
Every year 250,000 San Antonians jam-pack Hemisfair Park every 31st of December to ring in the new year with margaritas, live music, fireworks shooting from atop the Tower of the Americas. Mardi Gras and St. Patrick's Day along the River Walk are wild, raucous nights of partying for the sake of partying. We learn not to stumble into the river, because around the same time, we say, "Let's Rodeo, San Antonio!" -- which is a week of carnival food, creative drinks and crazy rides at the Alamodome.
And, ay dios mio, don't forget about Fiesta--a nearly two-week stretch of city-wide celebrations that includes a crazy parade, never-ending concerts, drinking contests, and excitement everywhere you turn.
5. San Antonians Suck At Making Music
I mean, think about it for a second. Name a handful of great musicians, bands and artists that emerged from S.A. Ya can't, 'cause it didn't happen. What's worse--try to find good live music on a Friday night while sippin' on a Shiner. Ya can't, 'cause it doesn't exist.
Sure, we strung together Pop Pistol and we have Jim Cullum for jazz (and please, please don't bring up the fact that Butthole Surfers originated here). Ok fine, Girl In A Coma is pretty great, but seriously that's it! And when it comes to the whole "live and local" schtick, we really don't know what we're doing. We're like cats playing keyboards.
You know it's bad when we will pack Fiesta in April for '90s bands that we thought were in jail or dead. Hmm, maybe that's why we need all those margaritas.
6. San Antonians Think Winter Is For Suckers
What is the winter season like where you live? Snowy? Below freezing? Why the hell anyone would live north of the Texas Panhandle is beyond them. San Antonians wake up on Christmas morning and rush out to the streets to play with thier toys, while the sun is shining and temperatures reach 75, sometimes 80-plus degrees. They love their shorts,
chanclas, tank tops and T-shirts.
And yes, they pay for it come summertime, when it's a chicken-roasting 110-degrees outside, but that's what the rivers are for!
7. If You Live In Southtown You're A Total Hipster
Think all the Texas hipsters live in Austin? Then you've clearly never heard of San Antonio's Southtown neighborhood? Fixed gear bikes, beards, and brews abound here, but instead of a sushi roll, insert a dressed-up mini-taco into the hands of the man with the black-rimmed glasses.
Say what you want about hipsters, but they know where the good food, beer and coffe are. Halcyon's coffee and 1919's crafty cocktails have put the once-decrepit Blue Star Arts Complex on the map. The Monterey, Bliss and Feast are just a few of the budding restaurants that have people of all ages flocking to South Alamo and South Presa Streets after dark. And unlike the hipsters in other parts of the country, ours are actually not a bunch of snobby neckbeards, because.
8. San Antonians Are Freakishly Friendly
You ever hear about that Texas hospitality? In San Antonio they take it up a notch. San Antonio is better than the Big D, happier than Houston, and a better atmosphere than Austin. In fact, we were named one of the five friendliest cities in America by Today.com! So try not to be creeped out by all the smiles and howdys, it's just how we roll.
9. San Antonio Men Are Judged By Their Truck--By Other Men
Trucks, or trocas, as they call them in San Antonio, make the man. Oddly enough, it's not the ladies who decreed this, but rather the gentlemen.
Ford F-150s reign supreme in Texas, and that is also true in San Antonio. Bonus points if you have a Texas Edition. Many truck-driving San Antonians say driving a Ford F-150 exude characteristics of quality, toughness, and an overall Texan demeanor. Mosey outside of Loop 1604 and you'll find a lot of Chevy Silverados in the county and working the farms and ranches. San Antonio men equally respect Silverados.
That's the basic lesson in Truckology. The deeper you go into customizations, the more San Antonio men may stop to ogle. Meeting a new neighbor at a stoplight to talk about where you got your side steps of set of chromes is a common occurrence.
10. San Antonians Are The Most Die-Hard Basketball Fans On The Planet
Laker fans? Miami Heat? No, sweetie. The Spurs are where the action's at, and everyone knows you just can't mess with the silver and black. The Spurs are four-time NBA champs and San Antonio love them for it. During basketball season San Antonians show their fandom in a unique way, instead of the usual "howdy" or "hello" friends and neighbors greet each other with an impassioned "Go Spurs Go!"
Whatever San Antonians do, they go all the way, whether its cheering on the Spurs, downing tacos and margaritas, tricking out their trucks, or trying (and failing) to make good music, its just all part of what makes San Antonians, well, San Antonians.
Feature Image Source: Flickr user knutties
