1. Orlando Is Not Walt Disney World, Dammit
Everyone everywhere immediately thinks of Disney, Universal, SeaWorld, and other attractions when they think of
Orlando. Everyone except the people who actually live here, that is.
Walt Disney World isn't even
in Orlando, it's down in some made-up place called Lake Buena Vista. The theme parks are well beyond the limits of downtown Orlando and its surrounding Main Street districts, which make up a good chunk of the actual city (no disrespect intended to the folks
way out there in Dr. Phillips and East and West Orlando, but, well...).
Like any large metropolis, real Orlando has distinct neighborhoods with their own personalities, arts and culture, entertainment options, quality dining, unique bars and cafes, shopping, engaged communities, and more.
2. But We Still Go To The Theme Parks—Just Never For Full-Price Admission
To dismount the high horse for a minute, yeah, while we resent how they hog all the attention, most of us go to the attractions. I mean, we like Harry Potter and spending hours waiting in lines too. Not to mention the water parks. It does get a little warm here sometimes.
But paying full-price (or even anything) for admission is for suckers.
At the very least, we take advantage of resident discounts. Since we live right down the road and can go often, we also pick up yearlong season passes that pay for themselves after two or three visits. The thriftiest Orlandoans, however, just stay on good terms with that aunt or that weird dude from high school who works at one of the parks and can provide free passes.
3. The Milk District Gets No Respect
First of all, yes, Orlando has a neighborhood called “The Milk District.” It's not a mean-spirited barb at a large localized lactose-intolerant population or a hotspot for public breastfeeding... there's just a big T.G. Lee Dairy plant in the middle of it.
Orlando's Main Street District program includes eight neighborhoods, but The Milk District remains the one glaring omission. Sure, it may not be as sexy as Thornton Park, as popular as Mills50, as charming as Ivanhoe Village, or as, umm, south as Downtown South, but The Milk District packs a lot in.
There's The Plaza Live, Drunken Monkey, Beefy King, The Book Worm, The Milk Bar, Sandwich Bar, Bull & Bush, Sportstown Billiards, Etoile Boutique, Se7enbites, Kyle's Bike Shop, Pom Pom's Teahouse & Sandwicheria, Retro Records, and more. Plus, there's the Tasty Tuesdays in the Milk District weekly food truck event.
Surely that roster earns some respect. And surely the area could benefit from some city funds for aesthetic improvements.
4. It's Funny When Winter Park Is Referred To As An Orlando Neighborhood
It's not uncommon for visitors, travel sites, and even major national media outlets to refer to Winter Park as a neighborhood of Orlando. Except that it's not... it's its own city in Orange County, immediately bordering Orlando to the north.
“So what?” you ask. Who cares about the semantics and some stupid error?
It's only amusing to people in Orlando because we know it really sticks in their hoity-toity craws up in Winter Park. The city is home to a rich, insulating, and sometimes downright snobby crowd (not to say that's everyone there—just a significant part of the demographics). They certainly don't want to be lumped in with the “riffraff” from Orlando.
They even stick signs up all over their city that say “Drive with extraordinary care.” And somehow, someone always manages to scribble out the last “e.” Visiting riffraff from Orlando, no doubt.
5. We’ve Got The Coolest Loch—Take That Scotland
I mean, just look at it... it’s magic.
There's little to no chance of a Nessie sighting at Loch Haven Park, but you might see a big red metal dog with a bone-shaped cutout in its body.
Loch Haven Park is Orlando's 45-acre “cultural park.” It's home to the Orlando Museum of Art, the Mennello Museum of American Art, the Orlando Science Center, the Orlando Shakespeare Theater, the Orlando Repertory Theater, the Orlando Fire Museum, and the Orlando Garden Club. All of which are surrounded by green spaces, shade trees, and lakes.
6. SunRail Will Save Us All
After a lifetime without a commuter train, or really anything much in the way of public transportation, Orlando has SunRail as of May 2014.
It's a godsend for the poor, poor saps who've had no alternative to the interminable traffic nightmare of I-4 at rush hour. And so far, Orlandoans have demonstrated their enthusiasm by packing the trains by the thousands every day.
SunRail currently runs from DeBary to Sand Lake Rd., but will soon expand to reach Deland to the north and Poinciana to the south. At this point, it's very much a commuter train, running only on weekdays, every 30 minutes during peak hours and every 2 hours otherwise, and making final stops by about 10 p.m. Hopefully, service will open up beyond this.
7. The World’s Best Sandwiches Are Made (And Devoured) Here
Vietnamese and Cuban cultures have considerable presence in Orlando, and so their cuisines are a big part of the city's food landscape. Foodscape. Whatever.
When it's time to grab a sandwich for lunch, forget another standard sandwich and another boring chain like Jason's Deli, TooJay's, or Firehouse Subs. Make it a Cuban or banh mi, please.
For Cuban sandwiches, Los Autenticos Cuban Cafe, Black Bean Deli, and ZaZa New Cuban Diner are local favorites. For banh mi, it's the plethora of Vietnamese restaurants in the Mills50 District—some local favorites there include Pho 88, Banh Mi Nha Trang, Boston Bakery & Cafe, Anh Hong, and Yum-mi Sandwiches.
8. The Joy Of Cracking Open A Local Craft Beer
Orlandoans know better than to try to get loaded on flavorless, characterless swill with a measly 3 to 4-something percent alcohol by volume.
There are so many great bars and breweries in and around town to explore an astounding variety of local, domestic, and international craft beers.
Redlight Red Light, Oblivion Taproom, Tap & Grind, The Milk Bar, Imperial Wine Bar & Beer Garden, The Falcon, Frank and Steins, Therapy Brew Bar & Wine Lounge, Rogue Pub, Cask & Larder, Orlando Brewing, and The Hourglass Brewery are just some of the key places for craft beer enthusiasts.
9. Park The Dial On PRK For Indie Music Cred
Like paper books and landlines and grandmothers, live radio may be one of those dying relics of simpler times. But one station keeps the people of Orlando tuned in and eager for more.
WPRK, which tags itself the “Best in Basement Radio,” is run by students at Rollins College in Winter Park.
And like any self-respecting college radio station worth anything, 91.5 FM plays an eclectic mix of genres, artists, and shows, steering clear of commercials and mainstream music to cast a broad and bright spotlight on deserving local, national, and international artists.
10. Who Needs Sundance When You Have The Florida Film Festival?
The Florida Film Festival is one of the coolest events to hit the Orlando area every year, as it has been for almost a quarter-century now. It's put on by the beloved Enzian Theater in Maitland, and features well over 150 films in two weeks.
It's one of the so-called “Big 15” U.S. film festivals, which means that an award earns a film Academy Award nomination consideration.
The FFF never fails to bring out serious talent in traditional and experimental veins, a diverse amalgam of interesting viewing, celebrity guests, and hoards of enthusiastic film fans from all around Central Florida and well beyond.
