1. “Don’t Worry, You Can Just Park Anywhere”
No. No, you can’t. In fact, you’re probably getting a ticket right now.
2. “I Won’t Eat That Garbage”
If it’s a Garbage Plate from Nick Tahou’s, you most certainly will eat that garbage. They’re a Rochester staple and one of the first things you’ll miss when you leave.
3. “Snowblowers Are A Total Waste Of Money”
Rochester is no stranger to snow, but that doesn’t make the white stuff any less back-breaking. Snowblowers can be the matter of life or death some days and they can even forge some lifelong friendships, considering there’s nothing you won’t do for the neighbor who clears your driveway after you’ve spent the past three hours chipping away with a shovel.
4. “New York City, Upstate, Same Difference”
New York City represents New York State about as much Donald Trump represents white people. They’re two very different worlds with only a state name to share. If you want to test this yourself, just ask people in NYC what their stance is on gun control. Then ask Upstaters what their stance is. Compare notes.
5. “Western New York? Close Enough”
As you can see, just being Upstate isn’t always good enough for the natives. Each region is broken up into their own little sects and are thought of accordingly.
6. “Where’s The Best Place To Go Sledding?”
If you need to ask where to sled, then you’re definitely an outsider. Kids and adults alike make the best of the snow, each with their own go-to spots which are probably where their parents brought them when they were kids.
7. “I’m More Of A Giants Fan”
This might not be Buffalo, but this is Bills country. Don’t think you can cheer for the Giants or the Jets here and get off scott-free—they’re nothing more than glorified Jersey teams.
8. “I Hate My Boss”
Okay, I can’t actually tell you how anyone in Rochester feels about their bosses. Unless their bosses are reading this, of course, in which case I’m sure it’s nothing but rave reviews. But as for Boss Sauce, the reviews are a unanimous two thumbs up. There are lots of local competitors, like Dinosaur and Country Sweet, but nothing quite compares to Boss Sauce.
9. “I Don’t Really Have A Favorite Lake”
This is Upstate New York. Of course you have a favorite lake, everyone does. It’s probably the one where you spent the most time at as a teenager or where your best friend’s parents let you crash at their pad.
10. “A Hot Dog Is A Hot Dog”
You take that wiener blasphemy somewhere else. In Rochester, there are two ways to order your dogs – white hot or red hot.
11. “Zweigle’s...Say What?”
Since we’re on the subject of white and red hots, it would be a crime to not mention Rochester’s most beloved brand – Zweigle’s. They’re found in every store and every barbecue across the state, so you won’t have to look far.
12. “I Never Cared Much For Dinosaur”
If you’re up north and it’s not from Dinosaur BBQ, then it almost certainly isn’t barbecue.
13. “Niagara? Never Seen It.”
Everybody and their mother and their mother’s mother has been to Niagara. It might not be quite as bumpin’ as the Canadian side, but there’s still nothing like it right in your own back yard.
14. “Any Custard Will Do”
Abbott’s Custard has been Rochester’s creamy tradition since 1902. That’s over a century of frozen deliciousness, with every cone somehow managing to be better than the last.
15. “Wegman’s Never Has What I Need”
Can a grocery store become mayor? If it could, Wegman’s would run Rochester, and do a damn good job.
16. “I’ll Take A Soda, Please”
Calling that carbonated beverage you’re holding a soda is a dead giveaway that you’re not from Rochester – or anywhere in Upstate, for that matter. It’s “pop,” now and forever.
17. “Fall Is So Bland Here”
Summer can be a lot of fun in Rochester, but there’s something extra special about fall. Maybe it’s the endless pumpkin patches or the cornucopia of rich colors or the way the leaves fall around you as acorns crunch under your boots, but there’s a reason almost everyone agrees that fall is the best Rochester season of all.
18. “Dunkin Donuts Has The Best Donuts, Hands Down. Ever.”
Don’t get me wrong, Dunkin is a-okay in a pinch, but when you want the real deal in Rochester, you go to a place like Donut Ridge Café.
19. “Canada? Never Been”
Canada is a day trip when you live in Rochester. You’ll find yourself hanging out across the U.S. border more than you will the state border inside the U.S.
20. “You Can Always Buy A Guitar Online”
To music lovers, House of Guitars is like the Wegman’s of the instrument world. The place with the famously funky commercials also boasts itself as the largest guitar store in the world.
21. “Any Brew Is Fine By Me”
More blasphemy. A Genesee will, however, do just fine. The local brew is always everyone’s favorite, so you’ll always find it on hand.
Did we miss anything? Tell us the last thing anyone from Rochester would say in the comments below! 
