1. Romantically Brooding In The Rain
Some places in Oregon get an astounding 100 inches of rainfall a year, but most Oregonians don't find that damp, dreary, mold-inducing or sad. They dig it! Overcast skies make them feel poetic and deep, and if it starts to pour (which is pretty much constantly) it won't stop them from riding their bikes, going camping or whatever they would do if it was sunny.
2. Doing Everything “Au Naturelle”
Portland hosts the World Naked Bike Ride, which I’ll leave to your imaginations. The Portland Art Museum sometimes offers free admission to naked people. And it’s pretty easy to find hot springs around the state where nudity is encouraged. There's even a vineyard near Ashland where there are topless, nymph-like grape-pickers—well, at least in myth. And only West Virginia has more strip clubs than Oregon. So grin and bare it, friends.
3. Shopping . . . Tax-Free
Oregon is one of the few states without a sales tax, which makes buying stuff—especially the expensive stuff—super appealing.
4. “High” Culture
Oregonians love the pot, and not the kind you cook with. Unless you're making brownies. In which case they love both kinds! Oregon was the first state to decriminalize carrying around those little baggies of the green butter flower that your Aunt Mary Jane feeds to Puff the Magic Ganja Dragon. Oregon was also one of the first states to legalize medical use of Le Cannibas herbs. Ow, my back hurts! Well get your prescriptions, Oregonians!
5. Any Recipes With Salmon
They like it smoked, baked, cherry-dipped, barbequed up in burgers, and even stuffed into pitas and eggs Benedict. They also love to catch their own on all the fishing trips they take. And then there are the people who fight for salmon civil rights. You really don’t want to mess with them.
6. Collecting Bottles And Cans For Cash
Oregon enacted the first Bottle Bill way back in 1971, and the people are notoriously epic recyclers. Turning in cans and bottles for the cash is also a great way to earn some side money. Gotta buy that pot somehow, right?
7. Getting Lost In The City Of Books
Powell's City of Books in Portland is the most amazing and enormous bookstore on earth. No digital revolution in sight here—it's all about hardcover hard copies of obscure titles and rarities and breathing in that new-book smell. Which is easy considering Powell’s stocks around a million books in 3,500 different sections.
8. Partying It Up In Wine Country
There are more than 400 wineries in Oregon, and each of them wants you to visit more than the next. Oregonians steal away for weekend vacays all the time to tour the trails and fields, occasionally hopping into hot air balloons. While topless! Wait, that's just a myth. Maybe.
9. Flying Their Freak Flag
Oregon is the only state with a two-sided flag. On the front it looks all normal and official, but on the back there's... a golden beaver. It’s actually an homage to the buck-toothed guys, which were beloved pets to the pioneers—who made hats and meals out of them.
10. Being A Rabid Beaver Fan
Like I said, Oregonians love their beavers… but especially the ones who play any sport at Oregon State U.
11. … Or A Duck Lover
U of O's athletic teams get a ton of love... and money.
12. So The Annual Civil War Game Is Basically A State Holiday
The Beavers and Ducks are major rivals. And by major I mean that they actually call their football showdown “The Civil War.” Things will get pretty tense at your game day parties when people are rooting for opposite sides.
13. Going Camping In The TeePees At Kah-nee-ta
Oregonians have a serious need to constantly be out in nature. And there's no better place to camp than the Warm Springs Indian reservation in central O. Luckily, there's a cushy resort close by for those modern amenities.
14. Being A Foot Soldier In The Timbers Army
Contrary to popular belief, there is more than college sports in Oregon. These people are crazy hyper for the Portland Timbers soccer team. They’re attempting to be the rowdiest fans on the planet, and they have got a pretty good shot at it so far from where I’m sitting.
15. Chillaxing While An Attendant Pumps Your Gas
Oregonians are progressive, "save-the-earth" hippies, but they do appreciate their little luxuries. The upside to being totally pissed off at pollution and Big Oil is that you don't have to pump your own gas in Oregon. Just kick back and relax while the little guy does it for you. Don't forget to have him check the oil and wash your windshield!
16. Watching A Show At The Globe
Ashland's Shakespeare Festival rocks the first Elizabethan theater ever built in the U.S. It's a little copy-cat Globe theatre just like the one over in England. But only part of it is covered, so bring a rain poncho for when that downpour starts.
17. Non-stop Festivals and Fairs
Oregonians have festivals for every little thing. Seriously, it would take you every weekend of your life to attend them all. They’ve got Renaissance fests, salmon fests, every kind of music and berry fest, air and quilt shows, mushroom festivals, art fests, bird fests, brewfests, and tree-planting fests. Whew. Oh, and loads of rodeos.
18. Berry Bonanzas
Ever try a Waldo or Triple Crown berry? No? Clearly you’re new to Oregon. One of the state's major crops is berries. What kind, you ask? Every possible kind. All the regulars like blueberries and strawberries, and tons of Marion berry "grandchildren" engineered with special "drupelets" and vigorous growing patterns.
19. Fields and Fields of Tulips
The ridiculously picturesque tulip farms are a major tourist attraction in Oregon. They even—surprise!—have a festival to celebrate them.
20. Kite Insanity
Oregonians are completely insane about kites. It's like a rule that you can't step onto the coastal shore without flying one—although that’s probably also due to the fact that the ocean itself is freezing, so kite flying is what Oregonians do at the beach. And you have to get a wacky, colorful kite. Don't be a dud.
21. Geeking Out At The OMSI
That's Oregon's Museum of Science and Industry to you. It's on the Portland waterfront and it's one of those must-dos for every kid (young or old) in the vicinity.
22. Ginormous Historic Airplanes
The Spruce Goose is the biggest and most historic airplane of all time or something. It's like a giant WWII boat that was built to fly. It’s awesome. Check it out in at the Aviation and Space museum just outside of McMinnville.
23. Thinking They Have The Best Coastline On Earth
It’s because they do. 'Nuff said.
24. Fawning Over The Eleven Light Houses
Oregon's coast has eleven olde-timey, awesome lighthouses that are perfect for photo ops, picnics and ghost-hunting.
25. And Majestic Sea Lion Caves
Who doesn't want to see a bunch of sea lions all up on each other on a big wet rock in a sea cave? You know you love that. Oregonians sure do.
26. Don't Forget The Sylvia Beach Hotel
Each of the guest rooms at this literary B&B in Newport has a writer theme. Remember, Oregonians love their books. Stay in the Jane Austen, Ernest Hemingway, or F. Scott Fitzgerald room and eat at The Table of Contents, the gourmet restaurant.
27. Cozying Up In Their Pendleton Blankets
Famous Pendleton wool was invented in Pendleton, Oregon. Nothing on earth is cozier and every Oregonian knows it, and is secretly (ok, not so secretly) proud.
28. Snow Play On Everybody's Favorite Mountain
When Oregonians aren't staring at Mt. Hood and going on and on about how gorgeous it looks from every angle they're actively hiking, skiing, snowboarding or partying on it.
29. Relaxing At Sunriver Resort In Bend
Oregonians who don't live in Bend regularly take weekend trips for some R & R. It’s like their version of the Hamptons.
30. Those Lewis And Clark Dudes And Sacajawea
Every kid who grew up in Oregon constantly heard about this trio in school, and how the heroes forged the Oregon Trail. They were basically the first ones to figure out that Oregon was cool, and everyone since has pretty much been late to the party.
