1. Nowhere You Go Will Ever Be Quite As Colorful
Maybe you’re sick of the same old same old, so you decide to get out. But you’ll quickly learn that try as they might, no one quite nails life the way Colorado can. From the people to the scenery and the never ending things to do, you’ll never find another place like it.
2. Everyone Will Assume You’re From Denver Or Aspen
You can tell them how great Boulder is or about the beer scene in Fort Collins but they won’t hear a word you say unless it has to do with Denver or Aspen.
3. You’re Probably Better Off Learning To Love Wine
Because your beer options will never be the same ever again and it’s more than just a little depressing. It’s easier to order a glass of cabernet than it is to learn how to love PBR.
4. You Will Be Devastated When Your Altitude Tolerance Goes Away
You and your lungs will be amazed at how much more air the rest of those guys down below are getting, and feel like a beast at the gym everywhere else for about a month. Then you’ll return to Colorado and be in denial as your body struggles to adjust to the change, despite being a native. It’s nothing personal.
5. People Like Being Inside… A Lot
You might find yourself going on all your outdoor excursions solo a lot of the time. Finding someone who shares the same love for the great outdoors as a Coloradan can be tough business.
6. You Become Instantly Crunchier The Minute You Leave
You eat organic, you buy local, you ride your bike, you recycle, you even compost, but you still aren’t even remotely as crunchy as some of your fellow Coloradans. But, once you leave state lines, that all changes. You’re now officially the crunchiest of the group.
7. You Get Landscapes Or You Get Buildings But You Don’t Get Both
You can move to a big city with huge buildings and bright lights. Or you can move somewhere with a landscape almost as cool as what you can find in Colorado. But you can’t find both in one spot like you can here. And you never really understand how awesome that is until you’re staring at endless slabs of concrete.
8. Go Ahead, Tell Them What Rocky Mountain Oysters Are
They’ll never stop being grossed out and it’s hilarious. Of course, finding them anywhere outside of Colorado presents a whole new challenge, but at least you can get a few laughs in.
9. A Mexican Meal Will Never Mean Casa Bonita Ever Again
Can you go diving in a Mexican paradise, eat sopapillas, and play a game of PacMan at Taco Bell or Don Pablos? Didn’t think so.
10. The Sun Doesn’t Love Everywhere Else Like It Loves Colorado
300 days of sunshine a year is pretty hard to beat. And you’ll kick yourself for all the times that you thought those partially cloudy days were actually cloudy. Trust me, you haven’t seen anything yet.
11. Good Luck Finding 58 Fourteeners
And even better luck finding someone who knows what that means.
12. No One Will Believe That You’re Crazier Than Raiders Fans
And without the Rocky Mountain Showdown, you won’t really have a reason to be.
13. You’ll Wish You Paid More Attention To Those Stars
A sky here is the same as a sky there, right? True, but not exactly. Cherish every last one of those midnight stars because finding a sky like a Colorado sky isn’t nearly as easy as you’d hope.
14. If You Order Your Food Colorado Style, People Will Assume You’re High
There is a serious lack of urgency when it comes to quality chiles everywhere else with the exception of maybe New Mexico and, well, the real Mexico. So, just get used to ordering your food up “extra spicy” and still be underwhelmed.
15. No, There’s Nothing Wrong With Your Chili
It’s red basically everywhere else, not green. They’ll tell you thinking that it should be makes you the oddball, but deep down you’ll always know the truth and what they’re missing out on.
16. Brace Yourself, Not Everyone Is A Bronco’s Fan
I’m sorry to be the bearer of such bad news. I know the truth hurts. But no, not everyone will share your enthusiasm of the Broncos. In fact, you’ll come across a lot of people who want to talk smack. But that’s what haters do. You know why.
17. You’ll Have To Leave The Pipe At Home
This one is an obvious one but it won’t really hit you until you’re gone just how weird it is. No, not everyone in Colorado celebrates 4:20, but plenty do. You can’t buy it, you can’t grow it, and you can’t smoke it. At least, not yet. Sorry, Shaggy.
18. Winter Can Be Downright Depressing
Even with the amount of fun you can have here, Coloradans do have their breaking point when it comes to winter. But when you leave and realize just how gray and lifeless winter can really be, you’ll regret all those times you complained back home.
19. Music Venues Will Underwhelm You For The Rest Of Your Life
Easily the coolest music venue from here to Mars, Red Rock never ceases to amaze even the most frequent visitor. You’ll feel unbelievably fortunate to have lived near it for so long. The flip side is that every other music venue you visit won’t even come close to giving you the same experience.
20. You Won’t Be Able To Work Out At Them, Either
You can run up the stadium seating at Red Rock for the work out of your life or you can throw a yoga mat down find your chi or whatever, it’s admittedly been a while since my last yoga class. You’ll be appalled to learn that other music venues around the country have the nerve to basically only provide music.
21. Life Will No Longer Revolve Around Your Training Schedule
It’s now the other way around. But, the good news is that no event will be quite as motivating as something like the USA Pro Challenge so you might not even care. It’s pretty easy to see, though, why Colorado is one of the fittest states in the country and world.
22. At Least Airports Are Significantly Less Creepy
I’m no conspiracy theorist. I’m sure you’re not, either. But we can probably all agree that if the New World Order ever does come to light, ground zero will be the Denver Airport.
23. Cars Will Try To Run You And Your Bike Off The Road
Colorado isn’t the only place in the country that likes their bikes, but it is one of the few that is serious about them. And if you find yourself in a suburb somewhere outside of the state, may God have mercy on your bike-riding soul.
24. You’ll Learn That Life Is Like A Box Of Piece, Love & Chocolate Company Chocolates
You really never know what you’re gonna get.
25. You’ll Have To Order Tea With Your Pizza
This way, you’ll ward off all the weird looks and accusations of being completely nuts when you ask for honey to dip your pizza in.
26. Baseball Outside Colorado Means Fewer Home Runs
Home runs abound in Rockies territory, but not so much other places. You won’t find any Rockies dogs, either.
27. Even The Rain Is Less Entertaining
Sure, you’ll find plenty of rain almost anywhere you go. But it’s just rain. Try finding a storm like a Colorado monsoon.
28. You Don’t Know How Good Smashburger Is Until It’s Gone
Other places will try to lure you in with the seduction of In-N-Out burgers or White Castle, but they can’t hold a candle to the deliciousness that is Smashburger.
29. People Will Think Your Loyalty Is Weird
Most people have a sense of loyalty to their hometown. But when they get a load of how strong yours is for yours, they’ll assume that it’s just that residual Colorado second-hand smoke getting to you. They have no idea.
30. Your Head Will Always Be In The Clouds
No matter how far you go, no matter how great it is, one thing will always remain true and that is that you will always miss your time in Colorado. From kayaking down the rivers to climbing way up high in the mountains, you’ll quickly learn that a piece of your heart will always be left behind.
What do you miss about Colorado? Tell us in the comments below! 
