1. Seriously Weighing Paying Rent VS Buying Seahawks Season Tickets
Such a good team…such expensive season tickets. The struggle is real.
2. When All Your Friends Want To Go Out Hiking But The New Season Of House Of Cards Is Out
Like…can’t you climb up a mountain next week? It’s not like it’s going anywhere.
3. Trying To Make Room For A Crab The Size Of Your Face
The key? Never eat the free bread. The free bread just equals less room in your stomach for delicious Dungeness crab.
4. Becoming A Total Seafood Snob
Every time you visit Midwestern relatives you have to try super hard to keep down that frozen salmon.
5. Keeping Up With The Latest Craft Breweries
Being a beer snob in Washington is seriously hard work, especially when it seems like a new brewery is opening every week.
6. When Your Older Out Of State Relatives Worry You’re A Total Pothead
“No, Granny, it’s okay. Seriously. It’s legal, and…actually it might help with your arthritis.”
7. Mild Winters Just Mean A Terrible Skiing Season
Most people rejoice at a super mild winter. Meanwhile, everyone in Washington is doing a snow dance and praying for a few extra inches.
8. But Then One Inch Of Snow Shuts Everything Down
Really? Everyone can drive in crazy downpours but a little snow on the ground and the entire state comes to a screeching halt..
9. Having To Work On The One Sunny Day All Winter
Do you go ahead and use your last sick day? Yeah…you use that sick day.
10. Mourning That Friend You Lost To Portland
RIP friend. You saw one too many episodes of Portlandia and that was the end. It was nice knowing you.
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11. Having Nothing To Do During No Shave November
When you already have a giant mountain man beard and every month is basically a No Shave month, all that November facial hair experimentation is just a bunch of strangers dipping in your pond.
12. When It’s Super Rainy But You Don’t Want To Be Made Fun Of For Your Umbrella
Can everyone just drop this “umbrellas are for wimps” act already? Sometimes it’s wet and cold and a raincoat just doesn’t cut it, okay?
13. Being From The Dry Side And Explaining That It Almost Never Rains
Every time you mention you live in Washington people say, “Oh…yeah, it’s rainy there.” At this point, you just smile and nod and appreciate the fact that you don’t have a Vitamin D deficiency.
14. Trying To Defend Microsoft When You Have An iPhone
“Yeah…but I would totally consider getting a Nokia phone…totally…someday.”
15. When Out-Of-State Guests Only Want To See The Space Needle
You know, that thing you never go up inside because why would you? This struggle is doubled when you’re afraid of heights.
16. Coping With Spider Season As An Arachnophobe
Late summer is basically just one long mental breakdown while battling giant house spiders.
17. When You Take West Coast Friends They’re Like “Where’s The Sand”
Why can’t they just appreciate the rocky gorgeous coastline and freezing water for the breathtaking spectacle that it is?
18. Being Any Amount Of Sea Sick
Ferries are out as a form of public transportation…which wouldn’t actually matter anywhere but Washington.
19. Having That One Friend Who’s A Diehard Believer In Cascadia
And politely nodding and smiling when they talk about seceding like it’s a real thing that’s actually going to happen.
20. Trying To Understand Directions As A Newcomer
“Oh go about a mile past the waterfall, then you take a left at the waterfall, and then it’s before the waterfall.”
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21. When You Constantly Have To Explain You’re From Washington State
And it takes the patience of a saint to shake your head calmly when someone asks for the thousandth time if you’re from D.C.
22. Having So Many Cute Sunglasses But So Little Time To Wear Them
You take every sunglasses choice on summer days very seriously, because you never know when the next time your favorite pairs will see the light.
23. Attempting To Wake Up Without Coffee
Yes, attempting to wake up without coffee might be a universal struggle. But in Washington you basically need coffee fed to you through a dropper like you’re a baby bird just to roll out of bed in the morning.
24. Trying Not To Think About How Many Volcanoes Could Destroy You
You’re basically just constantly at the mercy of Mount Rainier, and you’ve (kind of) come to peace with that.
25. Renting An Apartment With An Outdoor Pool
It seems super cool until you realize you’re paying for a pool that you get to use no more than half a dozen times a year.
26. Trying To Get Cell Service In Your Dream Home
And realizing you really have to embrace the hermit guy living in a cabin in the woods lifestyle if you want to live in a cabin in the Washington woods.
27. Trying Not To Laugh When Out-Of-Staters Pronounce Sequim Or Issaquah
And failing miserably to hold your laughter in.
28. Not Bragging Constantly About How Beautiful Your State Is
Whether you’re from the east or the west, there’s a kind of Washington beauty that can’t be beat. Now you just have to try not to constantly talk about it around people who live in less pretty states.
Know the struggles of living in Washington too well? Tell us about it in the comments below!
