1. “So You Live In Long Island?”
For the millionth time, no one lives IN Long Island. They live ON it.
2. “Is Long Island Part Of New York City?”
Let’s get something straight. NYC is part of Long Island, not the other way around.
3. “Where Can I Get Some Good Italian Bread?”
Long Island is nothing but good Italian bread, otherwise known as just “bread” here, found in the many Italian bakeries.
4. “What’s A Knish?”
A heavenly square of fried dough stuffed with deliciousness.
5. “I Thought Manhattan Had The Best Pizza?”
Everyone has their favorite pizza joint, so there’s no need to single any out. All you need to know is that Long Island has the best pizza in the world. End of story.
6. “Do You Spend Every Vacation At The Hamptons?”
Some yes, some no. The Hamptons are great, but they don’t come cheap.
7. “Why Are You Always So Excited For Breakfast?”
Because here in Long Island, breakfast means egg and bacon on a hard roll. The harder, the better. It is the ultimate breakfast of champions.
8. “Why Do You Have So Many Bagels?”
Because you can never have too many Long Island bagels! I mean, have you tried them?
9. “Where Can I Get A Good Burger Around Here?”
Say no more. All American Hamburger Drive-In.
10. “How Do You Say _____ ?”
You don’t just come to Long Island and know how to pronounce the town names. Quogue, Wantagh, Ronkonkoma, Islip, Massapequa…They come with the badge of being a real Long Islander.
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11. “Do You Know Billy Joel?”
No, but everyone’s mom knows someone who went to high school with him.
12. “How About The Long Island Medium?”
Nope. And don’t care to know her, either. And no, not everyone has hair and nails like that. (But a few do.)
13. “Is Long Island An Actual Island?”
Technically, no. It’s a peninsula. But it’s about 90 percent beaches, so it might as well be.
14. “Why Doesn’t This Burger Have Any Mustard On It?”
Because mustard on burgers is blasphemy, that’s why.
15. “Do Long Island Iced Teas Come From Long Island?”
What? Did you think they were called that because they come from Fargo?
16. “Do You Have Any Half And Half?”
If you mean half lemonade, half iced tea (otherwise known as an Arnold Palmer), yes.
17. “Is That Cookie Vanilla Or Chocolate?”
It’s both! It’s a black and white cookie. Stop asking questions and just try one.
18. “Man, Doesn’t That Guy Look Like The Karate Kid?”
He does! And that’s because it probably is. Ralph Macchio lives here with his family and he’s awesome.
19. “What Time Should I Get The Train?”
It’s the LIRR. And whatever time it’s supposed to be there, figure 13 minutes later.
20. “Do You Have A Decent Mall Around Here?”
Long Island has more than a “decent” mall. It has the Roosevelt Field Mall which is simultaneously the best and worst place in the whole world, depending on how much of a rush you’re in.
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21. “What Is An Egg Cream?”
A chocolate egg cream is somewhere between an iced coffee and a milkshake without the ice cream. It’s a delicious work of Long Island art.
22. “Is That A Giant Duck? And Is It A Building?”
Yes to both. What once used to be the home to a duck call manufacturer is now a Long Island landmark.
23. “Do I Have To Get My Italian Ice From Ralph’s?”
You don’t have to, it’s a free country. But you’d be a fool not to!
24. “What’s Up With Those Weird Elf Shoes?”
They’re Dutch clogs from Holland. The Long Island Holland, not the Holland Holland.
25. “What’s Up With That Accent?”
So what? Your accent sounds funny, too.
26. “Ahh, Is That Why You Call It Strong Island?”
No one normal calls it that, especially after that guy went and ruined it.
27. “It’s 2 A.M., I Guess There’s Nowhere To Get Something To Eat, Right?”
Wrong. Diners, baby. 24 hour diners where the longer the menu, the longer your stay.
28. “Why Is There No Beer At The Liquor Store?”
There’s plenty of beer in the grocery store. There’s just none in the liquor store.
29. “Is This The Same Adventureland As In The Movie?”
Yes. Yes it is.
30. “Do You Wanna Go To The Beach?”
That’s the ultimate silly question to ask a Long Islander. Of course they want to go to the beach. They live for the beach.
What’s the question everyone asks you just because you’re from Long Island? Tell us in the comments below!
