1. Fall Everywhere Else Will Be Ruined For You
Good luck finding an autumn view like the one you get in Vermont in October. You might go somewhere with warmer temperatures, but it will never look quite as beautiful as home.
2. And Winter Elsewhere Is Filled With So Many Whiners
People in Vermont complain about winter, too. But at least they have a reason to complain. When you’re dealing with people complaining over three inches of snow, it’s hard to keep your eyes from rolling out of your head.
3. But You’ll Be Happy To Discover That Winter Stays In Winter
The upside to winter in most other places is that it’s reserved for … well, winter. No more of flowers freezing over when it’s supposed to be spring and digging out from a blizzard for Halloween.
4. You’ll Wonder Where All The Mice Are
Sure, everywhere you go there will be mice somewhere. But nowhere quite like Vermont. The good news is that if you do happen to get the little buggers in your apartment, your new roommates will think you’re fearless.
5. But Not As Much As You’ll Wonder Where The Maple Syrup Is
This one probably just goes without saying, even if nobody told you. Leaving Vermont means leaving behind all that glorious, glorious maple syrup. You can find a bottle or two of it mixed among all of the high fructose syrup-filled imitations, but prepare to pay double.
6. And No One Will Understand That Syrup Can Go On Just About Anything
To everyone else, syrup is reserved for waffles and pancakes. Prepare to get some funny looks when you ask for syrup to go with even something as obvious as your cinnamon buns.
7. Grocery Shopping Is Suddenly So Fast
When you don’t stop and talk to everyone you see for 15 minutes each, you’d be amazed at how fast you can be in and out of a store.
8. Kiss Those Cider Donuts Goodbye
Because most people have never even heard of them.
9. Your Dollars Will Stretch A Little Farther
There’s no doubt, Vermont is an expensive place to live. On top of that, the job market isn’t the best. So, depending on where you go, you’ll probably have a little more pocket change.
10. And Don’t Worry, That Heating Bill Isn’t A Mistake
Heating costs are one of the biggest albatrosses to Vermont living. One of the benefits to leaving is that you’re most likely going to see a huge improvement on those heating bills, even without a fireplace.
11. You’ll Start Taking Credit For Ben & Jerry’s
It’s not completely a Vermont company anymore and you had absolutely nothing to do in creating or distributing it. But still.
12. And You’ll Laugh At How Many People Actually Collect Vermont Teddy
Another company that got its start in Vermont, the Vermont Teddy Bear company has a surprising fan base. You’ll still think it’s weird.
13. You’ll Be Amazed At How Many People Are Fine With GMOs
Vermont has been leading the country so far in fighting for GMO labeling while the rest of the country seems like they fell asleep. Probably from eating too much mutant corn.
14. Finding Alone Time Gets A Lot Harder
Once the novelty of having something to do around the clock subsides, the lack of ability to find solitude around every corner will set in fast and hard.
15. A Lot Of People Will Ask You Where Your Tin Foil Hat Is
Being from such a progressive state with lots of Libertarians and Independents with liberal points of view will make you stand out like a sore thumb in quite a few places that you might end up in. What you call normal opinions will be construed as conspiracy theory nonsense.
16. You’ll Make Everyone Look Like A Big Wuss
You’ve braved frigid temperatures, plowed your driveway, changed your tire, and fixed your snow blower with a roll of duct tape. And that’s all before lunch.
17. You’ll Have A Hard Time Finding That Same Country Feeling
You’ll have no trouble finding cities. And you’ll have even less trouble finding suburbs. But finding a place that still has that old fashioned, untouched country feeling is much, much harder.
18. The Air Will Never Be As Fresh
Get as much fresh air in those lungs as you can before you leave Vermont. It might be the cleanest air you ever breathe again.
19. The Roads Are Always Trying to Sell You Something
Vermont is virtually a billboard-free paradise. Other states? Not so much.
20. And Nowhere Else Will Be So Green
Lots of green and it’s all clean. You take it for granted while you have it but once you leave, the dinginess of everywhere else is one of the first things you will notice.
21. Your Cow Tipping Options Just Won’t Be As Plentiful
Just kidding. Everyone in Vermont knows they don’t even tip anyway. But the sights of all those cows and cattle will be a thing of the past once you’re out of here.
22. Cheese No Longer Falls From The Heavens
Unless you’re moving to France, don’t even bother trying to find somewhere that is going to compare when it comes to cheese.
23. In Fact, Dairy As A Whole Is Unimpressive
You’ll scour the shelves looking for the stuff imported from Vermont because even though everyone tells you that you’re crazy, you can tell the difference.
24. No Other State Is Weird-Awesome Enough To Have A Legit Dog Chapel
If it has to be explained, you wouldn’t understand.
25. …Or The World’s Tallest Cabinet
Because why not? And a special nod goes to the giant whale tails, too. Enjoy looking at the teensy Mona Lisa for the tenth time while Vermonters are having way more fun.
26. Farmer Fresh Will Rarely Be As Fresh As You Like It
Farmers markets can be found everywhere but they have a pretty high bar to reach the expectations you have after picking through the markets in Vermont for so long. Vermont didn’t exactly invent fresh, but it definitely has the market cornered.
27. Brace Yourself For The Impending Mother Myrick’s Withdrawal
There’s no coincidence that your love for sweets developed around the time that you first tried something from Mother Myrick’s. It’s nestled between nostalgia and your taste buds, making it so that no bakery could ever take its place.
28. Your Lemon Lulu Recipe Will Never Match Mother Myrick’s
You can, however, sate your cravings for those famous Lemon Lulus by having them shipped directly to you. So, that’s something to help keep you sane.
29. Your Perceived Level Of Hippie Is About To Skyrocket
You just know you like your air clean, your highways free of commercialism, your food clean and properly labeled, and the government out of your business. But what seems normal in Vermont is hippie almost everywhere else. Embrace it, man.
30. There’s No Place Like Home
What do you miss about Vermont? Tell us in the comments below!
