1. Going Through A Halloween Hay Maze After Watching Children Of The Corn
What’s the worst that could happen, right?
2. Working Overtime The Week Of The Iowa State Fair
How bad do you really need a job anyway? If a business in Iowa expects you to miss the State Fair, it’s really more like a prison anyway.
3. Or Worse, Being On A Diet During The Iowa State Fair
4. Having To Choose Between The Bacon Bucket, The Burger, Or The Tenderloin
That’s why you go to Jethro’s, where you can stuff your face with all three at once.
5. Making The World’s Best Sandwich And Discovering There Are No Sterzing’s
Okay, who was in charge of restocking the pantry? They obviously need to take lessons on how to grocery shop from that lady.
6. The Simultaneous Excitement And Frustration Of Caucus Season
“Hey, look at how many people want to come to Iowa!” is followed up seconds later by “Ugh, when are all of these people getting out of Iowa?”
7. Wanting To Love Jimmy Fallon
But you just can’t sell out Johnny Carson.
8. Having To Choose Between Exile Or Busch Lite
Exile is the craft of choice while Busch Lite is so tried, true, and cheap…
9. Seeing An Adorable Pet Pig On A Leash On Your Way To Baconfest
Why must you have such a cute face and be so delicious?!
10. Dating The Enemy
If you’re an Iowa girl, those guys were kind of cute… until they took their shirts off. When it comes to the Iowa-Iowa State rivalry, someone has to budge. And it’s not going to be you.
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11. Craving Made Rite In Sioux City
The two hour drive is worth it.
12. The Great Ketchup Conundrum
Someone was nice enough to bring you a loose meat sandwich from Maid Rite. The only problem is they put ketchup on it. What is this, Kindergarten?
13. You Have A Dinner Date But A Friend Stops By With Tenderloins
Maybe you can just meet up for coffee later. You don’t need an appetite for coffee, right?
14. It’s Time To Get To Work But Field Of Dreams Is On
And it’s the scene where his dad first shows up? Looks like it’s time to work on that fake cough because you’re calling in sick. Is someone chopping onions in here?
15. Explaining That Pork Princess Title To Outsiders
No, being crowned the Pork Princess isn’t an honor solely reserved for Pork Princess. It’s an Iowan honor, it just so happens to have pork in the title.
16. When The News Reminds You That Butter Isn’t Healthy
Oh, well. What’s really so great about arteries anyway?
17. Trying To Go Vegetarian
And then you get your first whiff of those turkey legs. That’s usually the point that marks the end of your vegetarian journey.
18. Wanting So Badly To Be A Couch Potato
But that Des Moines Active thing is just so infectious.
19. Being Part Of The Cheer Squad At RAGBRAI
Standing around motivating all those athletes to keep going Is a pretty laborious job. Did anyone bring a chair? Does anyone else need a nap?
20. What To Do With Three Of These?
Your housewarming party gifts yielded a new crock pot, a cool cactus, a vase you’ll probably never use, and three American Gothic paintings.
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21. The One Day You Don’t Visit Prairie Lights
Is the day the President swings by all “No big deal, just checking out some books for the WHITE HOUSE.”
22. Desperately Wanting To Hate The Idea Of Grass Flip Flops
But secretly wondering to yourself what genius came up with this idea and where can you meet them?
23. Studying All Week For ISU Finals And Then Crossing The Seal
Every student knows, you don’t ever cross the seal.
24. Explaining The Difference Between Iowa, Idaho, and Ohio
Spoiler alert: They’re THREE DIFFERENT STATES.
Know the struggles of living in Iowa too well? Tell us about it in the comments below!
