1. No One Else Likes Eating Garbage
Garbage plates aren’t a thing everywhere else? How is this even possible?
2. It’s Still Always About NYC
When people find out where you’re from, everyone has a story about the time they visited New York City as if that has anything to do with Rochester. As if they’re even on the same planet. Well, okay, it is the same planet. But that’s about it.
3. Hot Dogs Get A Lot Less Hot
No white hots? No red hots? No Zweigles? It’s official, you somehow found yourself in prison.
4. Barbecue Might As Well Be Extinct
You’ll have better luck finding an ancient fossil of a T-Rex than you will barbecue that rivals Dinosaur.
5. And Good Luck Finding Genny
If you’re in the mood for a Cream Ale, it could very well be quite a while before you get your hands on some. Oh, who are we kidding? No one is ever really in the mood for a Genny Cream Ale unless they’re in the mood to be in the bathroom all night. But it’s a good prank to pull on your new friends.
6. You’ll Miss A Bottle Of Labatt Blue More Than Your Mama
No more camping in the crisp fall air with a case of Labatt while you make s’mores around the campfire. What have you done?
7. Grocery Stores Are Just Grocery Stores To Other People
Nothing compares to Wegman’s. And no one will ever really understand why you love a grocery store so deeply.
8. And Lakes Are Just Lakes
And lakes are always great. But they’re never as great as the Finger Lakes.
9. Parking Your Car Is Much Less Of An Event Though
You finally got the hang of the alternate parking thing and now you’re leaving. Well, lucky for you, most other places don’t have such a thing. Unless you’re moving somewhere like NYC, in which case parking will be your biggest nightmare. I’m just kidding… No one from Rochester would ever move to NYC.
10. Abbott’s Won’t Be There On The Bad Days
Nothing puts a smile on a crap day better than some Abbott’s custard. Of course, now you’ll just have to settle for mediocre soft serve which might even end up making you more depressed.
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11. The Boss Will Be On The Radio But Not Your Chicken
No more sticky fingers covered in Boss Sauce to lick. Unless, of course, you take a lifetime supply of it with you.
12. Snow Makes Outsiders Go Completely Cuckoo For Cocoa Puffs
You know how you and your neighbors always laughed while watching the rest of the country collectively lose their minds over a few inches of snow? Congratulations. You’re now one of them.
13. And No One Will Understand Your Acclamation To The Cold
Most people think 35 degrees is still winter weather. But to you? That’s downright toasty.
14. Even The Worst Can Of Worms Elsewhere Is Much Less Frustrating
Not having to deal with the Can of Worms highway system is definitely one of the major pluses to leaving Rochester, there’s no way around that one.
15. Buying A Guitar Is Infinitely Less Cool
If you don’t play any instruments, this one won’t really affect you much. But if you have even a smidgen of love for music, losing House of Guitars cuts to the bone.
16. Kiss Those International Vacations Goodbye
No more checking in at the Canadian border on Facebook. And all that Canadian cash you have stuffed in drawers will be nothing more than a conversation piece. Bid farewell to your Canadian neighbors because it’ll probably be a long time before you can find time to visit again.
17. It’s Lent, Now What?
If you honor lent, just let the fact that you’re leaving all that fish fry behind. Enjoy your soup.
18. Waterfalls Will Be Ruined For You
When you grow up with Niagara Falls in your backyard, it’s pretty common to not see what the big deal is. And then you leave and see what waterfalls are like everywhere else. That’s regret.
19. You’ll End Up With A Lot Less Money
After you move, you’ll probably have a few weeks of wondering where all of your money went. Then it hits you that your whole cost of living thing has gone up since leaving Rochester.
20. No One Will Believe You When You Talk About The Music Scene
SummerFest, the East End Music Festival, and the nine-day-long Xerox Rochester International Jazz Festival, the Eastman School Of Music, Water Street Music Hall and the Eastman Theater…gone. And where else can you listen to singing Tesla coils? Only in Rochester, sorry.
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21. You’ll Miss The City’s Quirky Appreciation For Art
From the funky and sometimes strange murals on the streets to the creeptastic abandoned Rochester Subway underground, you’ll never realize just how unique Rochester really is until you’re gone.
22. If You Need The Time In Peru, You’ll Have To Ask Google
Speaking of unique, you didn’t think you’d care about leaving the Clock of Nations, either. But you will. You’ll tell everyone about it every time you’re in a mall and they’ll think you’re nuts, but you’ll still miss it.
23. No One Really Cares About Film
Okay, so film is pretty much all but dead for the average person. But if you’re from Rochester, you at least grew up in a household with a strong loyalty to Kodak. But you won’t find that loyalty anywhere else. No one else really cares and there’s something very sad about that.
24. Fall Becomes So Boring
If you’re moving somewhere that still has all four seasons, at least you’ll still get the changing leaves. But chances are, they won’t be anywhere near as vibrant as in Rochester. You also won’t get to run the maze or pick pumpkins at Long Acres Farms which means you might as well just skip right ahead to Christmas.
25. But You Might Actually Get A Spring
Sunshine, warmer air, blooming flowers, and no snow. Spring is not a myth! I’ve seen it!
26. No One Else Knows How To Play The Way Rochester Knows How To Play
History, science, and art museums are all great and you’ll be able to find a good mixture almost anywhere you go. But you’ll never find another Strong Museum ever again. And that sound you just heard? That was your inner child weeping with sorrow.
27. Other Amusement Parks Aren’t Seabreeze
Six Flags? Yawn. An amusement park without the Whirlwind or the Jack Rabbit might as well be a pop-up town carnival.
28. Tim Horton Won’t Make Your Breakfast Anymore
In most places, your options now become Dunkin’ Donuts and Starbucks, officially making breakfast the most disappointing meal of your day.
29. You Don’t Realize How Much You Like Loganberry Until It’s Gone
You could probably fill a swimming pool with all of the jokes you’ve ever made about Loganberry. But if you were to find it again randomly, you’ll think you just found Willy Wonka’s golden ticket.
30. Don’t Worry, You’ll Boomerang
Everyone has talked about leaving Rochester from time to time. Things get old and other places look so much newer and shinier. Some people even go through with it. But they always come back. Because no matter where you go, home is Rochester. And there’s no place like home.
What do you miss about Rochester? Tell us in the comments below!
