1. Bad Pittsburgh Accent Imitations
You know who’s really good at doing a Pittsburgh accent? People from Pittsburgh. You know who’s not? Everyone else.
2. Jokes About The Creepy Mr. Rogers Statue
Yes, everyone knows it’s creepy. You don’t need to say it again. But everyone loves Mr. Rogers all the same.
3. Mild Enthusiasm About The Steelers
There is literally nothing mild about a Pittsburgh Steelers fan’s enthusiasm. When you’re in, you’re all in.
4. Trying To Get Out-Of-Towners To Say Steelers Right
It doesn’t matter how many times you repeat Stillers, they’ll never get it right.
5. People Stealing Their Parking Space
Fortunately, the dibs chair is sacred. Everyone must respect the dibs chair.
6. Chipping Their Own Ham
Nothing beats a chipped ham sandwich, especially when you don’t have to chip-chop it yourself since every deli in Pittsburgh will do it for you.
7. Eating Fries On The Side
Why would you waste all that time eating fries and sandwiches separately when you could throw them on top and add a little coleslaw into the mix too. Mmm…Primanti’s.
8. Saying The Phrase “You All”
Pittsburgh residents probably save at least an entire day every year by saying “yinz” instead. Plus, it just sounds cooler.
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9. A Fear Of Driving Over Bridges
You might as well just stay in your house and close all the windows and never leave ever if you have a fear of bridge driving in Pittsburgh.
10. Boring Generic Architecture
The awesome PPG Place skyscraper is cool enough on its own, but it’s not alone.
Pittsburgh is full of an awesome mix of historic and modern architecture, plus all those aforementioned bridges. Plus, Frank Lloyd Wright’s Fallingwater house is a breathtaking work of art.
11. Driving Out Of Their Way For A Thrilling Day
Not only does Kennywood have the best rides, it also has a whole lot of charm (which is a rare thing to find in an amusement park).
12. Stopping To Watch Every Film Crew
The Avengers, The Dark Knight Rises, Adventureland, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, The Fault in Our Stars…after awhile you can hardly keep up.
13. All Those Jokes About The Pirates
Okay, so they’re not the best team in the world. But they’re not that bad anymore! If you would follow the team, you’d know that already.
14. Going To A Show In Some Grimy Run Down Venue
Hello there, gorgeous Carnegie Music Hall.
15. Or Watching The Pirates In Some Ordinary Ballpark
PNC Park’s skyline views are so distracting that you have to force yourself to just focus on the game.
16. Stuffy Ordinary Museums
When The Mattress Factory and the Andy Warhol Museum are right in your backyard, why even bother with anything less?
17. Paying City Prices To Live In The City
With those gloriously low rent and home prices and the meager cost of living, Pittsburgh residents definitely don’t have time for some over priced condo in a far out location.
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18. Living In A Concrete Jungle
Pittsburgh’s green spaces like Frick Park and Phipps Conservatory make the city feel a little greener than the average concrete jungle.
19. Explaining Pittsburgh Is Nowhere Near Philadelphia
Please, just buy a map. They’re even on your phone now. Just look at a map.
20. Eating A Subpar Pierogi
Fortunately, it’s hard to find a bad pierogi in Pittsburgh.
21. Staying Dead
Two words: Pittsburgh Zombiefest.
22. Cookies That Don’t Make You Smile
Best served with all that delicious so-bad-for-you-but-so-good diner food at Eat’n Park.
23. Having A Boring Vocabulary
Is that guy being a jerk? Nope, that’s too boring. He’s a total jagoff.
24. A Fridge Without Ketchup
When you live in the home of Heinz, it’s basically a crime.
25. Anyone Who Disses Pittsburgh
People who think Pittsburgh isn’t cool have obviously: A) Never been to Pittsburgh, or B) Have no taste and are a total jag-off. There are no other options.
