1. You’re Almost Definitely Going To Miss The Snow… No, Really
You spend December through March daydreaming about moving to a place where you can’t find a snow shovel for 1,000 miles. But when you leave this place, you miss it.
2. Lookout! Pennsyltucky Jokes, Coming Your Way
Outside of Philly and Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania has a reputation for being the redneck state of the northeast. If that’s what hard-working, blue collar communities filled with salt of the Earth people looks like to everyone else, then so be it.
3. And More Amish Questions Then You’ll Know What To Do With
Leave them alone, man. They’re good people, they keep to themselves, and they make killer kettle corn and rocking chairs. You’ll miss that stuff, too.
4. You’ll Try To Explain The Difference Between Amish And Pennsylvania Dutch
And then you remember that you don’t really know, either. But you know there’s a difference.
5. Get Used To Saying Pennsylvania
This is the only state where the residents refer to it by its abbreviation. It’s not PA anymore, it’s Pennsylvania. Just like it’s not TX, it’s Texas. It’s also not “Pennsy” but no one under the age of 60 has ever called it that, so no biggie.
6. You’ll Be Hard Pressed To Find An Eagles Fan
When you leave Eastern PA, you go from Eagles Country into enemy territory. No one likes the Eagles. They’re not really fond of the Phillies, Flyers, or the Sixers, either. Luckily, that Philly thick skin of yours means you won’t really care.
7. It’s Even Harder To Find A Steelers Fan
Because no one likes a winner unless it’s their team winning. And you can’t argue with six rings.
8. And No One Will Understand Just How Different Both Cities Are
People think just because they’re in the same state, Philly and Pittsburgh must be a lot closer than they are. Meanwhile, it’s a six hour drive and the difference of a universe or two. Cheesesteaks versus Primantis, youse versus yinz, ‘n at.
9. Godiva Will Never Replace Hershey
Sure, you can still buy a Hershey bar or a Kiss wherever you go, but it’s never really quite the same.
10. And Christmas Without Hershey Is Like A Night Without Stars
Winters without Hershey Park is pretty much like when The Grinch robbed Whoville.
//
//
11. Kiss Falls On The Water Goodbye
All those lakes, all those rivers, all those magically golden leaves – gone. In fact, you won’t find anywhere else that has such a perfect display of all four seasons.
12. You Can’t Find That Old Timey Charm Just Anywhere
If you think that old fashioned neighborhoods and close knit communities don’t exist anymore, then you’ve obviously never been to Pennsylvania.
13. No More Camping At Knoebels
You already know how awesome Knoebels is, but it was confirmed when it was listed as one of the Travel Channel’s top 10 amusement parks in the country. It just so happens to be one of the coolest campgrounds around, too. Are you ready to leave that behind?
14. You’ll Start Bragging About Crayons More Than You Probably Should
Watching how crayons are made is reserved for old episodes of Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood and trips to the Crayola Factory in Easton. No one will believe how cool it actually is. But admit it, you didn’t believe it before you saw it for yourself, either.
15. Kiss The Scrapple Goodbye
You’re not going to find it anywhere else, so don’t even bother asking. Considering what’s in that stuff, it’s probably better that you don’t, anyway. But sliced thin and fried crisp, Scrapple could take on bacon any day of the week. But once you leave, bacon is all you get.
16. Fireflies Will Only Live In Your Memories
Summer childhoods in PA almost all include running around your neighborhood with a mason jar that your mom punched holes in the lid of to house your new firefly collection of the night. Bonus points if you called them “lightning bugs.”
17. Your Pretzel Future Looks Bleak
Philly soft pretzels, Amish pretzels, hard pretzels, sourdough… Whatever the variety, there is no doubt that Pennsylvania is pretzel heaven. Leave and your future only includes Auntie Anne’s from here on out.
18. Nowhere Gets Pumped For A Groundhog The Way You Get Pumped For A Groundhog
Pennsylvania loves their infamous groundhog, no matter how many years in a row he predicts a late spring. Punxsutawney Phil is the head honcho in the meteorological world, but he’s not the only one.
If you’re from Lancaster, the only groundhog that matters is Octoraro Orphie. What other state is going to provide entertainment like this?
19. No One Will Appreciate Your Love For Peeps
They’re colorful, sugar-coated marshmallow chicks, what’s not to love? Made here in Pennsylvania, they’re so beloved that they even drop a giant Peep at midnight on New Year’s Eve in the Lehigh Valley, putting every other ball dropping around the country to shame.
20. Fall Without Linvilla Is No Fall At All
This one is for you, Delaware County. You can’t help it that you have a pumpkin patch and farm that makes all other farms look like they’re run by Old McDonald.
//
//
21. A Day Of Sesame Street Means Watching TV
Langhorne is home to the one and only Sesame Place in the whole world. Even if you don’t have kids, you can’t pretend like you don’t love Sesame Place and that you won’t miss it when you leave. Seeing Elmo come down Sesame Street for the daily parade comes second only to seeing Santa Claus at the Thanksgiving parade.
22. Prepare For The Inevitable Potato Chip Withdrawal
Folks in Central PA might want to start writing their requests for care packages now so that they’re ready to go when you leave. Not having Middleswarth potato chips around will hit you harder than you could imagine. A special nod goes to Utz chips for everyone else.
23. Buying Booze Gets A Lot Easier
Your friends will inevitably be bombarded with photo texts that you took of your first trip to the grocery store when you discovered you could buy lettuce, Pop Tarts, a six pack of beer, and a bottle of wine all in one trip.
24. There’s No Case Like Yuengling
While new craft and micro-breweries are popping up in droves all over the country lately, Pennsylvania is still most proud of having the world’s oldest operating brewery, Yuengling. Don’t expect to find a lager better than one that has been brewing for just shorter than 200 years.
25. There Truly Is No Strong College Love Than State College Love
Scandals be damned, nothing shakes the faith of students and fans. Most schools think they have that kind of loyalty, but most schools aren’t Penn State.
26. The Ride Out Has Never Felt So Smooth
Other states have some problems with potholes in their roads. Pennsylvania’s problem is more like roads in their potholes. Your car will definitely feel one of the few perks to leaving PA.
27. S.O.S. Means Something Different To You Than Everyone Else
Everywhere else, S.O.S. is a distress call for help. In PA, it’s creamed chipped beef on toast. You probably don’t want to go ordering it anywhere else.
28. How Do You Stuff Your Turkey?
If you’re from Pennsylvania, you know what you stuff your turkey with is called filling. But most other places call it stuffing while a few others call it dressing.
29. You’ll Hate To Love M. Night Shyamalan Movies
This one is especially true for the eastern PA crew. Despite the fact that you’re watching a movie where the trees are trying to poison humans because we littered too much, you still can’t help but watch. Crop circles in Bucks County and all those ghosts in Philly… It’s so bad, it’s good.
30. Other Town Names Are So Lame (But So Easy To Spell)
Pennsylvania proudly boasts towns like Virginville, Intercourse, Climax, Paradise and Pleasantville. Then there are the places (and rivers) that you only know how to spell and pronounce because you live here like Wilkes-Barre, Knoebles, Conshohocken, Bryn Mawr, and the Schuylkill. You’ll find other states to be much less colorful.
What do you miss about Pennsylvania? Tell us in the comments below!