1. No One In Washington Has Time For Umbrellas
There’s never a reason to bring an umbrella. All you need is a good pair of rain boots.
2. And No One Has Time For Waste
In Washington, recycling and composting are the norm. Waste is completely unacceptable.
3. There Is Zero Time For Anti-Marijuana Lobbyists
Now that it’s legal in Washington, there’s really no reason to fight it. Just roll with it….
4. No One In Washington Has Time To Dress Up “Formally”
It’s flannel shirts, jeans, and a North Face. No more, no less.
5. No One In Washington Has Time For Bikes That Aren’t Mountain-Ready
In such a mountainous (and eco-friendly) state, there is literally no reason to not own a mountain bike. How else are you going to experience the state properly?
6. And If You’re Not Up For A Hike, Washingtonians Probably Won’t Have Time For You
Washingtonians are born explorers. It’s how you see the best sights in the state. If you don’t have time for an adventure, a Washingtonian won’t make time for you.
7. If You Don’t Know What Cascadia Is, You’re Wasting A Washingtonian’s Time
The Pacific Northwest is better known as Cascadia by Washingtonians. If you don’t already know this (and don’t own, like, a million Cascadia flags) then you’re probably wasting a Washingtonian’s time.
8. No One Will Make Time For Crappy Beer
You better believe that a Washingtonian will have zero time for a Bud Light. With so many craft beers and amazing breweries, it only makes sense to buy local, delicious beer.
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9. If You’re Not A Skier, You’re Wasting Washington’s Time
If you’re gonna come to Washington, bring skis or get out. With slopes as gorgeous as the ones here, you’re just wasting time in the state if you don’t have your skis.
10. Cars That Aren’t Subarus = Waste Of Time
In Washington, it’s kind of a rule of thumb that you need to own one Subaru per family at the very least. It’s just the most practical car for all of that snowy, mountain driving.
11. No One In Washington Will Make Time For You Before They Have Their Coffee
Washingtonians are coffee-fiends. They invented Starbucks, after all. So you better not disturb them before they’ve had their morning cup of joe.
12. Washingtonians Don’t Have Time For People Who Aren’t Friendly
People in Washington are some of the most neighborly, friendly people in the entire United States. So, naturally, if you’ve got a mean streak in you Washingtonians won’t make much time for you.
13. No One In Washington Has Time For Earthquake Paranoia
While the news may have recently picked up on the fact that the Seattle area is long overdue for a massive earthquake, this is something Washingtonians have known their whole lives. So don’t be surprised if they don’t make much time for your paranoia.
14. Or Volcano Paranoia For That Matter
Living so close to Mount Rainier, you kind of get used to the whole volcano issue.
15. Frozen Fish Is A Total Waste Of Time
When you have so many opportunities to go fishing, fly fishing, and ice fishing, chances are you’re not gonna waste time with frozen fish from the grocery store.
16. And So Are Cherries From Anywhere But Washington
Don’t expect to see a true Washingtonian wasting time eating cherries from anywhere but Washington. Farmers markets = heaven.
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17. No One In Washington Has The Time To Explain How Their Town Name Is Pronounced
With town names like Sammamish and Puyallup, it’s no surprise that people waste time trying to pronounce them. But a true Washingtonian has no time for that.
18. If You’re Not A Seahawks Fan, The Border Is That Way
Living in Washington means you are a diehard Seahawks fan, no matter what. So if you’re gonna hate on the Seahawks, do it somewhere else.
19. True Washingtonians Have Very Little Time For Hipsters
Somehow Washington has gotten a huge reputation for being a hipster state, and Seattle has been deemed hipster heaven. That being said, many, MANY Washingtonians are ready for the hipsters to lose a bit of their hip and move on…
20. And Yet No One In Washington Has Time To Shave Their Beards….
Washingtonians can hate on hipsters all day, but they still don’t seem to have the time to shave their classic hipster beards…. hmmm….
21. And You Better Be Thrifty, Or Washingtonians Won’t Give You The Time Of Day
Again, regardless of the hipster stereotype, Washington does pride itself on being very thrifty. If you don’t know how to bargain shop, you’re wasting a Washingtonian’s time.
22. If You Don’t Make Time For A Washingtonian’s Dog, They Won’t Make Time For You
In Washington, dogs are allowed everywhere. Everywhere. Bars, grocery stores, you name it. So if you’re gonna hate on a Washingtonian’s furbaby, they’ll probably stop making time to hang out with you.
23. Washingtonians Don’t Have Time To Explain That Washington Is More Than Just Seattle
Do you know how many times Washingtonians have had to explain that being from Washington doesn’t necessarily mean you live in (or anywhere near) Seattle? It’s a big state, people!
24. If You Turn Your Nose Up At Canned Cheese, Washingtonians Will Turn Their Nose Up At You
Yes, WSU’s Cougar Cheese is canned cheese. But it’s the creamiest, most delicious thing in the entire world. So don’t waste time hating on it if you haven’t even tried it.
25. Washington Has Zero Time For Haters
Whether you’re hating on Washington because of the weather or the hipsters, Washingtonian’s don’t want to hear it. This state is incredible, filled with adventure and beauty, and there is no time for haters here.
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